More mood logging.

Mon- I honestly don’t remember. P
Tues- more not remembering.
Wed- terribly discouraged and overwhelmed.
Thurs- Irritable
Fri- very tired. And fuzzy headed, as evidenced by my recollection of Monday and Tuesday!

Baby growing chocolate.

These make me happy. And they manage a bit more nutrition (for the calories) then say, half a jar of Nutella. Not that I’ve ever been tempted to eat half a jar of Nutella while gestating. ** innocent look**

It’s totally a modified raw recipe I snagged from a friend a while back. And very yummy.

Chocolate “Cookies”

1/4 C cashew butter (you could use pureed soaked dates instead of this or the PB)
1/4 C PB
1/4 C raisins or chopped dates AND/OR dried unsweetened pineapple bits
handfull of raw sunflower seeds or almond slivers
2 TB cocoa or carob powder
several TB of honey
1 TB flax seeds
1/4 C uncooked oats

Mix all of the above, and spoon or roll into cookie sized balls. Sprinkle with unsweetened coconut.

Consume. Hopefully not all at one time. **Looks around shiftily** Of course, it’s not exactly celery, but, hey, you’ve got some iron, some calcium, some protein, some whole grains, some decent complex carbs, some vit. C….which is more than I can say for a roll of Tollhouse cookie dough! ;P Better baby growing food, as far as “treats” go.

Tastes better, too, in my humble opinion.

A HFCS article for you

Some high fructose corn syrup sources contain mercury.

Yet another reason to avoid the stuff. :OP

Apparently, some of the plants that produce it still use caustic acid in it’s production…and the caustic acid is the source of the mercury. Um, ew?

Great chickpea article!

Hummus not Prozac

A short excerpt:

“It is a known fact that Chickpeas, as well as other legumes, contain a large dosage of Tryptophan, an amino acid which is an important building block of serotonin. The latter, is a neurotransmitter, the lack of which modern biochemistry and psychiatry agree is strongly connected with “mood disorders” such as anxiety and minor depression.

Nowdays, the lack of serotonin is treated with SSRI (Selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors. Medicines such as Prozac, Seroxat, Cipralex etc.) which increases the amount of serotonin in the brain. A Tryptophan rich diet has a similar effect.”

Long live hummus! *grin*

Excellent Arkansas Homebirth Article

This is an outstanding interview of my friend Brannan’s home birth and the midwives who attended her birth! I was impressed by the positive light of the whole piece, and the sheer beauty of her birth.

The Article

Slideshow

(The slideshow of her birth (you can assume that everyone on my blog will be very true to birth, so here’s your obligatory “graphic” warning. I like to call it a “kleenex” warning! )

Mother Blessing…if you don’t care for gushing, disregard!

This Friday evening was my Mother Blessing! It was such a special and nurturing time, I was really blown over by the honesty and love and thoughtfulness that went into making it special!
When we all had gathered, we enjoyed some delicious chili and cornbread and my mom’s famous spinach, strawberry and goat cheese salad. I enjoyed it SO much *blush*, that I had to take my piece of cake home to eat the next day. (Jennifer, it was so delicious, I caught myself mourning the fact that I’d only brought one home with me instead of two, haha! )

Then, I was ordered into a comfy recliner and had my feet soaked in a hot basin with an aromatic herbal bath. Ahhhhh.

Everyone in the room shared beautiful words of affirmation and encouragement for me and this birth, and as they did, they placed a bead in a bowl for my birth necklace. Each one shared why they chose the bead they did, along with a scripture or birth poem or blessing. Even my 4yo daughter shared a bead she’d picked. They were all so unique, and so precious, and I, of course, cried buckets. I needed to hear every word that was shared.

We shared some letters and words of labor blessing sent from friends who live too far away to come, and the symbolism and love they expressed was really touching. (Yes, I cried. Of course I cried!) It was a humbling experience to have everyone share their encouragement and love for me so openly. Not something I’m used to, but it blessed me so deeply, I’m very glad they did!

We all announced ourselves around the room in relation to our lineage of motherhood. “I, Ashley, daughter of Donna, daughter of Linda, daughter of Faye”. It actually gave me beautiful shivers to think about it; even as we’re all markedly different from our mothers and grandmothers, we all pass down a line of motherhood, whether they be blood mothers or the ones who patiently (or impatiently) nurtured us. Love it or hate it, we’re all inextricably tied to womanhood, all the way back to the first woman who walked the soft black earth. It was an amazing thought. There has never been a human who didn’t come from a mother. As we announced ourselves, we fastened a ribbon the the arm of our neighbor, showing how connected we are.

All the women (and girl!) wrote a blessing on a cloth banner for me to have during labor. I loved having everyone’s unique way of expressing themselves and their heart collected in such a visual way. Looking at it is really encouraging and comforting; every women there has a way of bringing my spirit strength and peace in a way that the next couldn’t possibly do. Every woman’s unique light and strength and spiritual gifting holds something that I deeply need…if that’s not how the body of Christ was meant to be, then I don’t know what is.

Jubliee’s blessing about the Eshet Chayil, the woman of valor

More than anything, it reminded me that we’re all precious pieces of a crazy quilt that uniquely warms the world. Sometimes, we’re juxtaposed in ways that show our similarities, sometimes, our contrasting qualities bring out the beauty in one another. All together, we are STRONG, we are comforting, we are brilliant and beautiful, we are tough and practical. It made me cry (lots of) happy tears. Even though birth is a uniquely alone experience in the inward focus of the moment, the strength that we draw from (all in our own unique situations) comes from a lifetime of love from others and from our Father who has the gentle and fierce heart of a Mother. That is what pulls us through our tunnels towards the light.

Me and Cara

Life table, with “a few of my favorite things”

One of the many beautiful things I was given:
a pregnancy book filled with birth quotes and scriptures!

Beautiful birth affirmations from a friend. <3

Affirmations of Wisdom and Love For Your Birth

How beautiful a treasure is this day of my life, I will never forget the joy of today!
I will not look at time except to gaze at the sun or stars.
My baby and my body know exactly what to do!
My Heavenly Father has designed me for this exact, wonderful purpose.
All I have to do is breathe, nothing more, just relax and breathe.
My breath is sweet and deep, carrying oxygen to my body and my baby.
I am focused on the moment of joy and exhaltation when my baby will be in my arms!
When I think I cannot endure it, I will remember that means I’m almost done!
My body is a river, my baby knows the way.
God has not given me a spirit of fear, but of peace and love.
Peace washes over me and lets my baby feel wrapped in love.
I am picturing my daughters’ faces when they meet the baby!
I can’t wait for the moment our whole family is united!
I am strong, I am healthy, I am created for this purpose!
I will be in labor as long as it takes to bake, frost and eat a chocolate cake! yum
The quiet I need is within me, I only need to close my eyes and breathe.
Soon, my healthy, beautiful baby will be at my breast and in my arms.
There are women laboring with me right now, all over the world. We are strong together!
I am not pressed for time, indeed I am in a peaceful place without meaning of time.
I will get out of my body’s way and let it do the work it knows best.
The air is pure and lovely, filling me with renewed strength and peace, I drink it deeply.
A world of friends and family who love us are covering us in joyful prayer right now.
I can’t wait to see my baby for the very first time, I can’t wait for our first cuddle and peek!
Birth will be everything beautiful I have ever wanted and hoped for.
I celebrate my strength and God’s miraculous works within me!

“Hush, hush,” said the Moon, “Turn out the light. Someone new sleeps with us tonight!”

Thank you, K! <3

Emotional Lottery

So far, emotionally, this week has gone:

Sun: Insanely ragey and distraught
Mon: Withdrawn and quiet.
Tues: Slightly irritable, but productive
Wed: Unreasonably giddy and cheerful
Thurs: Weepy and sentimental over every blasted little thing

There you go. It’s like Wheel of Fortune: you never know when you’re going to hit the jackpot or go completely bankrupt. May I have my head back now, please? :OP

______________________________________________________________________________________________________

In other news, baby is growing and we’ve all taken to talking to him/her on a regular basis. Little one obviously startles at sudden noises or weird movement, and calms when I put a hand on it’s back/bum and speak soothingly. That’s provided a wellspring of weepy ammo in the weepy department today. So precious, and I’m getting more than a little antsy to hold this babe and whiff it’s baby head.

Our four year old asks daily, “How many more days? Tomorrow? This weekend?”

My 2yo ran into my bedroom yesterday, and announced proudly, “Mommy, you HUGE!! I love you, my huge mommy. ”

Har. Why, thank you, darling.

I’m currently sitting on my couch, downing glass of water after glass of water. I wake up very thirsty every morning, as my body’s requiring more and more water to support this active baby, my growing blood volume and myself…and if I don’t, I have Braxton Hicks contractions like mad! I love the peacefulness of watching winter’s blue morning light filter through the windows before my kids wake up and beg for oatmeal with peanut butter. Besides a few brave crows outside cawing in what I know must be freezing cold, it’s QUIET in here. It helps me find my center for the day.

And how important is finding my center for the day? Very. :OP I’m feeling clumsy and heavy and my hormones are in full swing right now. Just ask my sweet, bewildered husband. A little peace can go a long way. Some people need coffee to start the day right. I need quiet. And about a gallon of water.

For the past 3 or 4 weeks, I’ve been getting little packages of beady goodness in the mail. Precious friends and family from all over the country have been sending me special beads and letters of encouragement for my labor necklace! I’m enjoying reading their notes immensely. As a mother of young children, you’re often blessing with sweet little kisses and bear hugs throughout the day, but words of affirmation come few and far in between sometimes…it’s been such a special experience to have friends share their hearts and prayers with me during these tricky, funny last weeks.

It’s been a blast to see how different, expressive and symbolic they are. They’re as varied and beautiful as all the women in my life are, and knowing that they represent thoughts and love from all these living treasures has been a real honor and treat. One of my friends even sent a pretty green mug with a leaf handle she made herself! If that’s not incentive to drink my Red Raspberry Leaf tea (which is an EXCELLENT uterine toner, btw, and good for period cramps, too), I don’t know what is!

My Mother Blessing is this Friday. I hear there will be chili and chocolate cake. I’m so there. I’m excited!

Favorite birth quotes

Women’s bodies have near-perfect knowledge of childbirth; it’s when their brains get involved that things can go wrong.- Peggy Vincent Baby Catcher

“Midwives see birth as a miracle and only mess with it if there’s a problem; doctors see birth as a problem and if they don’t mess with it, it’s a miracle!” Barbara Harper, Gentle Birth Choices

“Hope has two beautiful daughters. Their names are anger and courage; anger at the way things are, and courage to see that they do not remain the way they are.” Augustine

“When you have come to the edge of all the light you know and are about to step off into the darkness of the unknown, faith is knowing that one of two things will happen: there will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught how to fly.” Patrick Overter

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. How precious to me are your thoughts, O God!
Psalm 139:13-17 NIV

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.
Matthew 11:28-30 NIV

“Just as a woman’s heart knows how and when to pump, her lungs to inhale, and her hand to pull back from fire, so she knows when and how to give birth.”
-Virginia Di Orio

300,000 women will be giving birth with you today.
Relax and breathe and do nothing else.
Labor is hard work, it hurts and you can do it.
Unknown

N.L.’s waterbirth

“Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished.”
Lao Tzu

If I had my life to live over, instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I’d have cherished ever moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.
-Irma Bombeck

‘We have a secret in our culture, and it’s not that birth is painful. It’s that women are strong.’
-Laura Stavoe Harm

“The whole point of woman-centered birth is the knowledge that a woman is the birth power source. She may need, and deserve, help, but in essence, she always had, currently has, and will have the power.”
Heather McCue

‘There is power that comes to women when they give birth. They don’t ask for it, it simply invades them. Accumulates like clouds on the horizon and passes through, carrying the child with it.
Sheryl Feldman

“We’ve all been waiting for you.
For you.
Your arrival has been marked, has been recorded
on earth,
in the universe,
in the galaxies,
in all of space,
in all of time.

You come with a birthright, written in love and sung
through all Creation in words which promise
that no matter where you’re at,
you’re home
that no matter who you’re with,
you’re welcome
that no matter who you are,
you’re loved.
Welcome.”
Rita Ramsey

“I often say that our bottom part function best when our top part
-our minds- are either grateful or amused at the antics or activites
of our bottoms. It is amazing how much better they work when we think
of them with humor and affection rather than with terror, revulsion,
or, worst of all, with shame. Lord knows we can’t turn our backs on
our bottoms.” -Ina May Gaskin, Ina May’s guide to childbirth

Your body is not a lemon! -Ina May Gaskin