The Power of Positive Intent

One of the more life changing things that GCM has taught me is the assumption of positive intent.  This concept when fully grasped can change every single relationship in your life.  I should note that there are people who will show again and again that they do not have your best interest at heart and that calls for boundaries. A very wise Mama once told me “If someone shows you who they really are, it would be wise to take note of that.”

But that is not what I want to talk about here.  What I want to talk about is the difference when you view others as people made in God’s image who are being perfected at this very moment versus viewing them as totally depraved. What if my child is exactly how God made him to be as opposed to a vile sinner who it’s my job to fix? What if he’s not out to get me or make me crazy (even though it sometimes feels that way) but just learning where the limits are? What if I don’t even concern myself with intent and just address the behavior?

I find that I am much less angered if I don’t assume that he is being defiant, oppositional and a whole bunch of other things that require me to guess at what someone else is thinking. You just can’t know what anyone else is thinking and in the case of a child more than likely they just weren’t. So whether he slammed the toy because I told him not to or because he was frustrated or something else doesn’t really matter, we just put the toy away.

The other thing is I don’t waste a bunch of time concerning myself with what everyone else thinks or means. If I want to know I can just ask them. What a concept. It sure reduces unnecessary drama. I wish I would have known that years ago. You can disagree with me wholeheartedly and it not be an attack on me personally. and I can totally disagree with you without judging you. Positive intent has made a huge difference in my life. Thanks to the ladies who have given me a safe place to learn and practice. <3